Move over, Justin Beiber and bakeries that only sell cupcakes. There is a new obsession in Provo.
Enter: JIMMER FREDETTE.
Even small Utahan children and Lavell Edwards are singing his praises. Literally.
Many of you have probably already read the Facebook/Daily Universe hullabaloo about Jimmer, which is, admittedly, pretty funny. So funny, in fact, that even ESPN picked it up. You see, one disgruntled co-ed wrote the Daily Universe, irritated by all the “idol worship” our boy Fredette was receiving. Jimmer-ites quickly found her Facebook page and retaliated.
The Facebook feed was borderline sacrilegious, but funny, nonetheless. To save you the effort of reading through it all, I’ve picked out the gems for you:
“[Jimmer] is the one and only true basketball player at BYU. I could send a couple of our representatives to tell you more about the Jimmer.”
“A sports free education is why they created BYU-Idaho.”
“Jimmer never said it would be easy. He just said it would be worth it.”
“One time, the BYU Basketball team was walking across the beach and when they looked back, they saw only one set of footprints.”
“It may seem evil unto ye to scream in the Marriott Center, bu for me and my house, we will watch the Jimmer.”
“You haven’t asked the Jimmer with a sincere heart and with real intent or he would have manifested the truth of it unto you.”
“I recite 32 Hail Jimmers before I leave my apartment in the morning.”
“If you want to express you feelings directly to the Jimmer, you can email him at firstname.lastname@example.org.”
“Jimmer is the eleventh commandment.”
“You knew what Jimmer was when you picked him up.”
“There have been none, save Danny Ainge himself, that hath done more for the salvation of BYU basketball than the Jimmer.”
“And on the eighth day, God created Jimmer.”
“Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Jimmer, who is on SportsCenter, is perfect.”
“We talk of Jimmer, we rejoice in Jimmer, we preach of Jimmer, we prophesy of Jimmer, that our children may know what source they may look to for a three-pointer.”
“No unhallowed hand can stop Jimmer’s work from impressing.”
“Jimmer touched MC Hammer.”
“Jimmer is unFredetteable.”
“It’s nice to be important, but it’s more important to be…like Jimmer.”
“Let Jimmer ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado. Let Jimmer ring from the curvaceous peaks of California. Jimmer at last! Jimmer at last!”
“It is better to dwell in the Marriott Center and watch the Jimmer than to dwell with an angry and contentious woman.”
(FYI, there were over 250 more comments.)
Poor Michelle Peralta. She never saw it coming.
And on the subject, this is just kind of fun to watch: